Healing Emotional Pain

By Aiala

Healing your emotional pain it’s not an easy task.

It demands strength, courage and will, which we not always have. The good news is that Art Therapy is of great help here, since through doing art you can start a healing process in a safer way that enables a sense of holding and protection. It’s just you and your art. Your art will become the witness and supporter of whatever you are going through, and will be there for you unconditionally, in a non-judgmental way.

I believe that the process of healing has different stages, all very important and necessary.

The first step is recognizing and legitimating the fact that you are in pain. This can be very hard. No one wants to feel needy and being in pain can lead to feelings of inferiority or that there is something very wrong with me. We are super scared of being judged, called “crazy” or being abandoned and rejected for whatever is going on inside of us.

The good news is that at the time you recognize that there is something bothering you, 50% of the job has already been completed!!As soon as you recognize that in fact something is bothering you, you can start working on it.

So the second step is trying to find out what is bothering you. This is not always possible, since sometimes it is just too soon to understand or connect to the root of your pain (since this action itself it’s unbearable for it is just too painful!). If you do know what the root of your pain is, healing can be easier.

Below are some techniques that I find helpful. You can use either all of them or just the one you feel more comfortable with.

Technique #1: drawing with your non-dominant hand. 

This exercise was first originated by Dr. Lucia Capacchione, who started using the technique of drawing and writing with the non-dominant hand as a healing method in her therapies. This approach helps you connect easier to your unconscious mind, and therefore healing in a deeper way. 

1.       Make sure you have a private place to sit peacefully, without being interrupted or bothered for at least half hour – 45 minutes.

2.       You should have with you some regular white papers and colors (oil pastels will do great and are recommended!).

3.       You can have some relaxing music in the background if it helps you relax.

4.       Close your eyes and try to connect, feel your pain.  In which part of your body its sitting? Try to visualize any shape or color.

5.       Grab a color with your non-dominant hand and start drawing your pain. Since it’s with your eyes shut, don’t expect an exact or realistic result. Just let yourself be in the process.

6.       Now you can open your eyes. Try to see if you can find different shapes or figures (could be only one) in the drawing and remark it. You can add colors and shapes.

7.       Try to make a dialogue with the outcome product.  Questions as: who are you? Why are you here? What would you like to teach me? How can I help you heal? are usually helpful. If you want to follow Dr. Capacchione's technique to the fullest, write the questions with your dominant hand, and the answers with the non-dominant one. 

Example:

The first drawing, with you eyes shut

The second drawing, finding shapes or a picture inside the squiggle.

The Squiggle Game, described by pediatrician/child psychiatrist D. W. Winnicott, is a pencil-and-paper technique for usually used to help children express their thoughts and feelings. Still, i find it very useful to use it for adults as well, specially when the feeling inside is of blockage and the source of the pain in unconscious yet.

Technique #2: Art as therapy – expressing your pain through art doing. 

This is an exercise that invites freedom of expression, and usually I feel much better and relieved after the doing.

In this exercise you just need to grab art materials and literally make your pain. Could be with collage, drawing, dough or any kind of material you feel that represents your pain inside. The amazing part of it is that you can keep going back to this art work and change it every time you feel like according to the evolution and changes of the pain (lessens or worsens) until you feel it starts healing.

To read more about the Art as Therapy technique, click here. 

Example:

A woman made her pain with oil pastels and gauze.  When she felt that the wound reopened, she added red pain over the gauze. At times she felt the wound was healing, she turned the red paint into brown as if it was a shell that started to cicatrize. 

Technique # 3: Healing the inner child.

Pain usually finds its source in unfinished business, wounds that escort us from our childhood years. To learn how to work with and heal our inner child click here.

Technique #4: Expressing and Healing through Photo Therapy.

"Photographs are footprints of our minds, mirrors of our lives, reflections from our hearts, frozen memories that we can hold in silent stillness in our hands -- forever if we wish. They document not only where we have been, but also point the way to where we might perhaps be heading, whether or not we realize this yet ourselves..."  -- Judy Weiser, R.Psych., A.T.R, Founder/Director of the PhotoTherapy Centre

I've noticed that many times we do have a picture in our mind on how we feel or how the pain  looks like, and this picture is very real, even tangible - in a non-literal way. 

since photographs are basically realistic pictures, a specific shot may be associated with emotions unconsciously embedded within these and they can serve as natural bridges for accessing, exploring, and communicating about feelings and memories (including deeply-buried or long-forgotten ones), along with any psychotherapeutic issues these bring to light. Therapists find that their clients' photos frequently serve as tangible symbolic self-constructs and metaphoric transitional objects that silently offer inner "in-sight" in ways that words alone cannot as fully represent or deconstruct {1}.

Examples:

Through this picture, a patient that had recently divorced expressed her inner feelings of being broken. She would explain it as "her life being cracked as a glass, without any chance of repair". Taking different shots on broken glass helped her express her inner feelings and connect to her broken self.
*note: the picture above is not the original one. I decided post something similar that resembles the original one in order to protect my patient's intimacy.

 "The world through my depressed eyes". 

"Trapped in darkness"

In the pictures above, a patient expresses his pain as a long-term depression patient. Through the pictures, the patient could express his feelings of loneliness, helplessness and feeling trapped in his situation. Through this technique, he finally felt he could actually express exactly how he felt. To me as therapist it helped to connect and understand in a deeper way his pain. 
By being able to understand him better, the patient felt relieved in a noticeable manner,  held and understood. This helped him grandly to relief the loneliness and helplessness in his depression, since at the minute he felt that someone (in this case me, his therapist) was there with and for him, he no longer felt alone to deal with all his heavy burden. He could finally start feeling loved and accepted, no matter how dark and scary it felt inside. 
Both pictures are original work, and previous consent from my patient was received for public publishing.

After you have finished working with any of the exercises above, make sure you legitimize your pain. You can use phrases or Mantras such as: “I love and accept myself together with my pain deeply and completely”. “Pain is not a bad thing. It is just a reminder that I am a healthy human being with feelings” “I accept and respect my pain lovingly and completely”.

Remember: feeling pain is normal. We all do many times in our life. Sometimes it just takes longer to heal, depending on the wound. Please treat your pain and yourself with respect, love and empathy. Don’t try to fight it. It will just make you feel more frustrated and helpless and the pain could worsen. Just accept it and eventually you will heal and feel much better.

 If you think you have been in pain for a bit too long and it’s starting to affect your daily life, please read my first article on Emotional Pain and look for professional help. 

Reference:

{1} www.phototherapy-centre.com